Love who you are more than what you do
April, 2025
I quit my job last week.
As with most people in the creative industry specifically, it’s been a pretty rough couple of years. Add on staying at the same agency for over 5 years, you can begin to get a bit too comfortable with where you’re at—even if that came at the expense of your mental health. I had hit a hard ceiling at my current place of work in regards to my growth, and after surviving 5-6 rounds of restructurings, I knew I had to leave before my luck ran out. I unfortunately had to hit a new low mentally to come to the full realization of that. I was depressed, and every layoff round that involved losing friends and colleagues just continued to affect me and my overall output. I wasn’t happy with the person I was becoming.
Back in February of 2024, I emailed my therapist with the subject line “Getting back into therapy.” To be honest with you, I was hesitant on sending that email because I had just finished seeing her about 6 months prior when I was able to finally conquer my anxiety. Going back to therapy felt like I had failed in some way, even though me going back was about my depression rather than anxiety. I was at the lowest point of my life, and I knew I needed to get help. I would embrace some of the most negative feelings I didn’t even know I had because it truly felt like there was nothing else to grasp on to.
I sent the email, and over the last 14 months I’ve been able to slowly work through my struggles with my identity, and how that relates to work with my therapist. Turns out, shocker, it was my job that was eating away at me. When the new year came around, something just clicked. I'm still figuring out what exactly clicked, but I think the idea of me turning 30 this summer didn’t sit right with me if I was entering a new decade of my life while feeling stuck at a place that felt harmful to me.
So, I gave myself a real deadline. I either find a new job by July 1st (just a few days before my birthday) or I quit—regardless if I had a job lined up or not.
Instinctually, I immediately got to work. I launched my new site, redid my resume, but most importantly, I leaned into the headspace of being in love with who I am, my skills, my interests, my likes and dislikes. It was a realization that there is no job on this planet that could define who I am, and that my sense of self and the love I have for myself will never come from a job.
I’m starting a new job in the first week of May, and there aren’t enough words to describe how I feel right now. My mood has significantly improved, and I feel like a 500-ton weight has been lifted from my brain.
I’m falling in love with myself all over again, and I couldn't be happier.